I said something out loud to my father after the last time we watched The Untouchables together.

“If someone walked up to me and told me that The Untouchables was the greatest movie ever made, they would be wrong. But I would never, ever correct them.”

Brian de Palma’s 1987 version of the Eliot Ness / Al Capone story is a marvel of a film. Thanks to a still-giving-a-shit Kevin Costner and an Oscar-winning performance by Sean Connery, the film just speaks to me. The unsung hero of the film is the score, which Italian master Ennio Morriccone composed. I still think it’s the greatest end title music in any film ever.

While Robert de Niro is great as Capone, it’s not his movie. It’s the titular foursome and their dynamic that sells it, with the mission to remove corruption from Chicago at its heart.

(Spoilers) If you don’t tear up when Malone is gunned down in his home, when he speaks with his dying breath to Ness “What are you prepared to do?!?” I can’t say there’s much hope for your soul.

de Palma has made some good movies — Carrie, Mission: Impossible — and some stinkers — The Black Dahlia, Scarface [sorry, Italian-American culture (which is also weird, as Tony Montana is Cuban) it’s not very good] — but The Untouchables is his brush with greatness. Do yourself a favor and watch this movie. Right now. Like, stop reading, and go do it. I’ll wait.




Now wasn’t that awesome?